Category: Adulthood

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Stories Writing

In a crazy world where good things happen.

3.

From about 3pm onward recently I have found tiredness getting in the way of my smile and upbeat enthusiasm. I’m done. It’s as if the business slows along with my energy. It is during this time period when good stories get me through.

The other day I was getting faded when a lady came in adhering very strictly to the social distancing measures. I get it. Everyone is being careful but some are certainly stricter and way more scared than others. This is no time for judgement. I simply went with it a reached as far as my arm would let me in order to take the note from her and then had to semi chuck the change back into her hand.

Apparently I wasn’t being as subtle as I had thought as she cottoned on to my confused expression.

It turns out she works for the NHS so witnesses this pandemic through a very different perspective to me. I admire them all.

We got chatting. She was telling me how awful the supermarkets are and because she is in the vulnerable category as well as working longer hours, she is trying to get deliveries rather than physically going shopping.

She was telling me how difficult it is to find slots available despite having a reason to be classed as a priority customer. We were discussing how ludicrous it all is.

I asked if she had our number, ensured she lived locally (as in not in Manchester or something drastic when delivering would be insane) which I knew she would, and explained how we would deliver if she ever needed.

She was delighted and didn’t realise how much we stocked. Nor did she realise that we offered to deliver.

That was one worry off her mind, she said, and happily left.

Another happy tale.

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is available on Amazon along with the sequel Don’t Tell Jack. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey, then please subscribe to my newsletter by dropping your name and email. There will be plenty of giveaways, news hot off the press and an honest insight into life as an author. Thank you x

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations Stories

In a crazy world where good things happen.

2.

Pasta. Rice. Toilet Rolls. Kitchen Rolls. Tissues in general. Plain Flour. Self-raising flour. Dishwasher Tablets. Fairy Liquid. Hand Soap. Cereal. Granulated Sugar. Icing Sugar. Caster Sugar. Baking Powder. Bicarbonate Soda. Tea Bags. RICH TEA BISCUITS.

What next?

These are all items that we, in a little shop, have struggled to get hold of. I don’t know first hand as I haven’t experienced supermarkets during this crisis, but I have heard and seen pictures of similar situations there. The wholesalers are the same. It’s mad.

It even scares me how low alcohol supplies are getting. We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it…*PANIC PANIC PANIC*

I’m enjoying day two of isolation. It is 11:45am and I am still in pyjamas and in bed. I have left twice. Once at 5am (thanks to my, now one year old, pup) and once a little later to have a cuppa and hot cross bun downstairs.

I’m not one bit embarrassed to admit this.

Mostly I have been reading – Grown Ups by Marian Keyes, it’s brilliant, check it out, I simply cannot put it down!!! – but also thinking up good things about the times we are living in. Trying desperately to steer clear of the negatives. This brings me onto another story. Numero 2. This one is less of a story but more of a general selection of many stories.

It’s the little things.

The prime focus is my boss and lovely friend. As well as teaching me many lessons in life about seeing the good in everything, there is no such thing as can’t, and there is always a reason for one more glass of wine (just to name a few important ones), I have always known she is wise and has a plan to solve any given situation.

Recently she has not failed to amaze.

Many people, from all walks of life, more than usual have been coming into the shop. People who didn’t even know about it have diverted our way in order to avoid the lengthy queues at supermarkets.

Each new customer welcomed by us, looking for their own selection of essentials, not one expecting us to stock the nation wide now rare products listed above. Who’d have thought it?

They’ve not met our Kaf and her wisdom. Now they are thanking her wise Irish ways!

While the wholesalers are still lacking in all of the above, catering sized is the way forward.

Yes, from the genius of Kathy’s brain we now spend our days measuring out and bagging up kilo bags of flour, kilo bags of rice, 500g bags of pasta, 80 Yorkshire Tea Bags, finish dishwasher tablets, and even filling water bottles with fairy liquid. Etc. Etc. Etc.

Needs must, Kathy is a gem and many happy people leave with more than expected. Great. Good work.

…another happy story during terrible times.

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is available on Amazon along with the sequel Don’t Tell Jack. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey, then please subscribe to my newsletter by dropping your name and email. There will be plenty of giveaways, news hot off the press and an honest insight into life as an author. Thank you x

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations Stories

In a crazy world where good things happen.

1.

The world has gone mad. We are living in ridiculous times. However, among all the worry, the fear, the dreadful situations we are hearing about every single day – there are also really good, really lovely stories.

For example. The sun is out. I am in the garden enjoying 1 of 2 days off. I am writing this post from a sun lounger…A SUN BLOODY LOUNGER! In England. And I am considering at what time I can be bothered to walk ten steps into the kitchen to make myself a Gin and Tonic. Life is alright.

This sparked an idea for a mini blog series entitled: In a crazy world where good things happen. This is it. Post numero uno.

I don’t know how often I will post parts of this series. It might be more than my usual target of two posts a week. Who knows? It depends how many good things happen.

But, and in the nature of how my blog has always been, I am noticing a lot of snippets of material lately. So I thought I would share some of the good stories with you. Let’s face it, we’ve all had just about enough of the moaning and negativity.

Good Friday is always a good Friday. We open for only half the day. It’s usually quiet and we usually get closed up by midday ready to enjoy the first part of the bank holiday weekend.

This one was different. Chaos from start to finish. A later finish. We made it home by 3pm.

Each time it kept quietening up, more chaos happened and we had to push back closing for another hour. Another hour seemed like another week when we were as tired as we were. A part of this chaos was in the Post Office.

A lovely lady came to us asking if we would take over one hundred parcels. She had been clearing out her loft and sold a lot of puzzles online. Of course we would, we never turn people away.

Genius in this current climate I say, you’ve hit a market there!

She had already been turned away from a few places so we felt even happier to be able to help. Working through the parcels my eyes turned blurry. We were nearing the end of the busiest week ever and we are all shattered.

Feeling good having completed them before close ready for the post the following day, we left.

Saturday morning we were closing up. In came the lovely lady for her change and receipts, ever thankful for our efforts. In one hand she took the receipts and money left over, in the other she handed us a huge box of chocolates. No need, but gratefully recieved.

I thought that was a lovely story.

These tokens of thanks go a very long way.

NB: I have weeded a lot of the garden this morning, I’ve not only been a lazy arse.

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is available on Amazon along with the sequel Don’t Tell Jack. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey, then please subscribe to my newsletter by dropping your name and email. There will be plenty of giveaways, news hot off the press and an honest insight into life as an author. Thank you x

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

Things isolation has taught me:

  1. People can be kinder when stressed and worried
  2. People can be a lot nastier when stressed and worried
  3. I am lucky
  4. There is usually a solution
  5. Learning to just be is a very very healthy skill to learn
  6. There is always hope
  7. Beer/Wine IS essential
  8. It will take more than a pandemic to make my place of work “quiet”
  9. Dawn O’Porter is awesome!
  10. Doing nothing (to most Brits) involves a large alcoholic beverage
  11. Someone will always moan
  12. Tiredness is nothing compared to what so many others are going through
  13. Helping others creates a happy you
  14. This too will pass, always.
  15. Daffodils are beautiful, spring still happens, nature still happens no matter what
  16. Thankful for sunshine
  17. I write better in the sunshine
  18. Living on a diet of sugar and wine is ok
  19. There still isn’t much time in a day
  20. Some people find staying home a lot harder than others
  21. Struggling to stay awake past 8pm isn’t for the oldies. I’m 25, I’m struggling!
  22. Our customers bake really lush cakes!
  23. I’m very lucky to have a garden
  24. Exercise comes naturally when I have one allowance to leave the house on my days off
  25. I’m happy to work
  26. Sitting outside post-work is a blessing
  27. I have lots of blessings
  28. The busier I am, the more unhealthy my diet is
  29. Simple things are the best things
  30. I needn’t wish for more

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is available on Amazon along with the sequel Don’t Tell Jack. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey, then please subscribe to my newsletter by dropping your name and email. There will be plenty of giveaways, news hot off the press and an honest insight into life as an author. Thank you x

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Writing

I think I had a bad dream…

I think I had a really bad dream the other night, I woke into a world where everything had gone wrong,
There was this virus that was spreading faster than anyone could handle and people were suffering, the figures rising on and on.

Other countries ahead of us were breaking news so scary to hear,
It was like watching our lives before it happened and knowing exactly what to fear.

It was like a film, still is, it doesn’t seem real,
Happy, full of gratitude and luck, I don’t know how else to feel.

Self isolation, quarantine and social distancing were the measures,
Pub closures, restaurants, any place where people gathered.

Life as we knew it was put on hold,
Stick to the advice we were told.

So, tell me, what will go down in history, how did we react?

Flocking to supermarkets and buying everything off the shelf,
First it was toilet rolls, then pasta, paracetamol, eggs and bread all those in good health.

While others at home struggled to get the goods,
Those who really needed them, they were stuck in the hood.

So Boris tried again, he came on tele to simply say:
Stay at home, please everyone. Unless it’s essential take another day.

Thankfully the situation appears to be improving,
Though the queues in the supermarkets, I’ve heard, are not moving.

The shelves are filling slowly and essentials many are able to get,
The round of applause on Thursday evening is something most will never forget.

Community is coming together and kindness is appearing near and far,
Just think, please, before you get in your car.

It’s for the wellbeing of the world, we must abide,
Stay at home, support the NHS, and help to save lives.

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

This week I vow to find my personality

I am writing the first part of this blog post today, Sunday, after a week where tiredness has sucked every sense of personality out of me. I will check back in on Wednesday before posting this to see how I am getting on.

Something Dawn O’Porter wrote on her Patreon recently really resonated with me. She said: ‘Today was hard. My energy levels were zero. My personality was zero. My willingness to at least try, was zero. I really struggled.’

One of the many things that I admire about NHS workers, with the horrific shift patterns, is their energy. Aside from their incredible knowledge and skill set, their energy and enthusiasm through it all is amazing.

Never have I seen a miserable nurse, a pissed off paramedic or an impatient Doctor. It’s just not in their nature.

This past week I have found that tiredness has overruled. I’m usually smiling, at work anyway. I have to be. I work with people. Nobody wants a misery guts making them a sandwich or helping them post a parcel. I usually feel energetic and enthusiastic to help even the nuisance customers. I have a lot of patience, on the outside, and I mean it when I say thank you. Last week this was not the case.

Nurses and doctors and everything in between are tired. Of course they are. They spend their working days saving lives. I never see them crumbling to this, outwardly showing how they inwardly feel.

This week I vow to find my personality again.

To not let tiredness win. To overrule and be happy. To smile even if inside I am screaming. To find energy in any way that I can. To appreciate everything and to not put much time into negativity.

Monday arrived and I still had a bee in my bonnet. I was not having it and I couldn’t shake my negative way of being. Conversations seemed meaningless. I couldn’t even try. Everything got to me and I wondered if I would ever be the same again.

Gradually the day got better and the large gin at the end of it gave me some upbeat energy but anger still filled me. Mostly.

Tuesday came and it was like I’d been drip fed amphetamines through the night. It was lovely.

I woke up with so much more energy, ready to converse with even the slowest, dullest in society. I was working better, my brain made more sense and putting the increasing numbers of orders together didn’t feel like solving an algebra equation.

I was joking, genuinely laughing, really smiling and not getting down about tiny little nagging things. These brushed over me like the wind. I didn’t even meditate!!!!

Of course the day wasn’t perfect. Nothing ever is. Frustration came in ebs and flows and I began to think that over-tiredness and being overworked was starting to get to us all.

Yet this was mixed with laughter. Meaningless, squiffy overtired laughter but so much laughter. I felt alive again.

Wednesday morning (today) has been welcomed with a much needed lie in, a read, a slow get up and a hearty breakfast (Spaghetti hoops on toasts counts as hearty in these desperate times).

I’m feeling tired, but I’m feeling good and ready to get through another day helping others get through these terrible times.

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

Isolation: the reality

This is all a bit strange isn’t it? I think we’re all feeling a bit weird.

I didn’t think that the isolation situation had got to me yet. All week I have been busying about at work with just a few hours out in which I cleaned my desk, played with my dog in the garden and generally enjoyed not staring at a selection of groceries working out which order they belong to (I am happy to help).

Each evening I have gulped a few beers faster than usual before crashing into a heap in the land of nod. Shattered.

Saturday afternoon was the first time I had a good amount of time to myself to experience what the majority of the nation had experienced all week. I loved it. I slept a lot, sat down a lot and enjoyed a run where more people were out wandering than usual.

I watched a film in the evening and consumed two civilized beers before taking myself to bed in my newly cleansed room. It felt good. After applying a good amount of hand cream to my ever crisping hands, I fell asleep, stinging a bit.

I woke on Sunday morning feeling fresh. It was 6:20am which was actually 5:20am and my dog was barking. No change there. Waiting it out a little to see if we would both go back to sleep, I gave in and went downstairs to boil the kettle and let my dog out for a pee (I couldn’t cope with him wetting the bed that early in the morning).

A cuppa in one hand and my dog in the other, I felt very content and headed back into my dozing slumber. The next few hours were spent in and out of consciousness. Reading, cuddling, drinking warm beverages and eating a pastry.

It got to half eleven and I text some friends in the village to see if they needed anything as I was off to Waitrose. It was like a normal Sunday. This is not a normal Sunday.

I wasn’t really thinking but assuming that my trip was essential being the first time I had left the village all week. They replied urging me, quite rightly, to stay home. So I did.

Beer – not essential. Snacks – I have plenty. Other essential items – not essential. I can do without shampoo for one day.

It made me realise that I was probably justifying my one trip, but what I really was after was sanity for my mind. I soon realised there are plenty of ways to get this inside the home. During isolation. Alone.

Don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy my company, time to myself and a Sunday filled with doing absolutely nothing but when my mind is a bit crazy, which it has been for a few weeks, I struggle.

I’m not going to pretend that I am completely ok with this scenario we find ourselves in. I’m not afraid to admit that my mind is more chaotic than ever. OF COURSE IT IS, I AM A WRITER. That a trip to the beach, more than one walk, a drive out and a mooch around the shops would help. I’m just saying all of this can wait and they will come and we will look forward to them.

It isn’t essential that we go out. It is essential that we try and stay home.

I’m about to listen to Dawn O’Porter’s So Lucky podcasts while sorting another area of my room. While my mind feels wild at the moment, I know it’ll feel calmer after. Just like it would after a drive. Just like it would after a trip to the beach. Just like it would after a mooch around the shops or a sip of a beer (of which I have NONE!).

While this may be a lot more painful for so many of you, I’m just trying to say as I’m just realising myself that we all need to adapt. Those moments will come but for now there are many ways we can find peace within our minds.

Listen to the radio (perhaps not the news). Meditate. Put on your favourite playlist and dance around the house. Stare out into the sun. Appreciate the view. Tidy. Sort. Read.

I think it will do our mental health some good. I hope it will anyway.

I hope you have a peaceful Sunday x

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction

Community is key.

The biggest, most important thing in all of this is coming together, it’s community.

Yes, I spent my Sunday mostly alone and losing myself in the fictional world of my book, forgetting about reality for a while. However, while being on my own, while those of you who have taken the decision to isolate are doing so and everyone else out there too – we must be together as well. Virtually together, but together.

We are in this together.

While we are encouraged to remain apart for the safety of the vulnerable and to help prevent spreading the virus, it is together we must do this.

Together we must wash our hands, be mindful. Together we must remain apart, two meters apart to be exact. We must work together in keeping small businesses afloat by getting involved in their takeaway options. We must volunteer together to even out the workload by offering to help neighbours and communities.

Our village is brilliant.

I work at the village stores and post office and I am proud to do so. In the week we got a notice through from Post Office Ltd informing us that we are key workers in this crisis and boy do I feel that way.

As tired, exhausted, baffled at the stock piling as I am, I am also proud and feel useful and extremely ever so extremely lucky to be in the position that I am. I know many people out there are struggling, terrified, distraught and worried about the outcome and how this will affect them.

Each day I walk to work I ooze with gratitude.

I’m grateful to be working and helping the community. I am happy to be posting parcels to keep small businesses going and seeing small business still booming in the current shit show that is the economy. I feel lucky to be helping out locals in desperate need of certain products (sadly not toilet rolls or pasta). PLEASE STOP BULK BUYING, THE WHOLESALERS ARE EMPTY AND WE NEED TO STOCK FOR VULNERABLE PEOPLE IN OUR VILLAGE AS WELL). I know how lucky I am and I wish to help as many around me as possible.

On Monday BBC news dedicated a page to positive news. I felt this was a huge step forward and something that needs to be done more often long after this crisis is over.

It’s not all doom and gloom. It’s never all doom and gloom.

I’ve decided to link all my posts for the time being to the current global pandemic because what better time to write creative things and make people smile than in a crisis, but for today I will leave you with a good experience.

I was at the wholesalers the other day. The same old story. The shelves were bare. People were getting angry and frustrated. Due to the sheer demand of products on our shopping list I still found myself dragging a trolley the weight of a large horse through the car park.

I had to take it even further than usual because the place was rammed and someone had TAKEN OUR USUAL SPACE. And breathe. While trying my best, but clearly outwardly showing my struggle, a kind lady offered to help. You’d never get that usually. Together we dragged and we made it to the van. Thank you. If you are reading this. Thank you again.

There is light in this all. There is hope. It will end.

Take care, stay safe xoxo

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction

2020.

2020. What a year so far. Shall we just draw a black line through it and start again? I think maybe we should.

I personally started the year with so much enthusiasm and positivity. I think we all did. It just sounds good, right? 2020.

Even numbers, round figures, a new decade and Brexit to finally happen within the first month. It was all looking so good and maybe we’d start to hear about something else in the media.

Was I right or was I right? I was right about one thing. Brexit isn’t so ‘boom boom boom’ in our faces. Instead we had storm after storm after bloody storm. Both physically and metaphorically. I love the wind but I was beginning to lose the plot with it all.

My social plans were being cancelled left right and centre – I just wasn’t risking the fury I would get into if I got on a train. Cancelled. I mean, eight hours to get back from Worcester on a Sunday, my only day off, no thank you. I wouldn’t even see my friends and that was the point of going.

It’s all too much. Bad news after bad bad sad news. Terrible. It’s really made me reevaluate life and attempt to see things from a new perspective. I haven’t cracked it quite, but I’m working hard to break through the fog.

I spent last weekend at the coast to switch off from it all, to step off this crazy world for a day or two. It worked. The buzzing chill took longer to set in than it usually does, but after 24 hours it was firmly within me.

I had experienced some of the Coronavirus chaos in witnessing the panic buying, the empty shelves and the fighting talk over loo roll, but driving down the country roads of Suffolk on Monday morning, I felt quite peaceful.

I came into work and BAM. It was everywhere. Our village shop was getting hit in the madness. Unable to keep up with the increasing stock demand. The wholesalers shelves are empty. The news and figures are terrifying. How much alcohol needs to be in a hand sanitiser and if I have that same amount within my own body is that the same?!

Everybody, quite rightly, is washing their hands profusely. It’s all we are talking about. Quarantine isn’t a word I thought would be flying around in March 2020. Lockdown. Self isolation.

IT IS ONLY MARCH!

I’m clinging tightly onto the positives in attempt to remain sane. I will work as hard as I can.

I will work to stay clean and be responsible in containing the virus.

I will work hard to keep my place of work functioning as a vital means within our small community if lockdown should happen (and of course before it does) and I will help as many people around me as possible.

I will work hard on my attitude to look at life differently. I’ll try not to bloody moan so much and be kinder to those around me.

I will work hard to be happier in general because in all of this how else can you be? I mean, spring is here and it’s getting warmer. Last night we sat outside for a drink. OUTSIDE!

It’s crazy times and we’ve all got to get through it. That’s all we can do. Meanwhile I’m going to look up that alcohol stat, reckon I can handle more than four G&Ts this evening 😉

Take care everyone, stay safe x

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is available on Amazon along with the sequel Don’t Tell Jack. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey, then please subscribe to my newsletter by dropping your name and email. There will be plenty of giveaways, news hot off the press and an honest insight into life as an author. Thank you x

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations Writing

Since when did our world get so busy?

Since when did our world get so busy? Since when did we struggle to find time? Time has always been the same length. So tell me, what happened to mine?

Since when did we start having to set reminders; to text back, to wake up, to go out to dinner, to put things away. How did life get too manic that when we finally manage to stop we don’t know what to say.

Since when did we wish for things to slow down so much that we get home and lock the doors just to escape for a while.

If someone asks us to help out in the evening, we struggle to find the energy to go that extra mile.

Since when did work engulf us and every other aspect just have to fit in? To the point where we have to book a holiday and force ourselves, force ourselves to give in.

Since technology, since globalization, since everything got faster and easier and more complicated.

All these wonderful developments in this wonderful world that are all going to end up simply hated.

It has forced us to speed up, it has forced us to cram everything into the shortest spaces of time. It has forced us to find ways out to a simpler life and a bit of peace of mind.

Sometimes, just sometimes, take a slo-mo moment from your day. Perhaps don’t even stop just slow down and notice all the good around you in so many ways.

Notice friends, notice nature, notice family, notice pets, notice sounds, notice how it feels to be alive.

It is almost too much, so often too much, but what most of us want is easy and for easy we must strive.