Category: Adulthood

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Writing

Pause For Thought

While doing the dishes, a pause for thought,
Waiting for the kettle to boil, pause for thought.

While walking your four legged friends, a pause for thought,
Waiting for a train, pause for thought.

While brushing your teeth, a pause for thought,
When you’re in the shower, pause for thought.

While sat in a waiting room, a pause for thought,
When you’re eating your lunch, pause for thought.

During the adverts on TV, a pause for thought,
Waking up five minutes before the alarm, pause for thought.

While travelling or stuck in traffic, a pause for thought,
The moment before you fall asleep at night, pause for thought.

In this busy little life we lead we have to find perks indeed,
Noticing areas on the daily can help keep our sanity.

Whether it’s at home or work and even if only short,
There are always moments in this busy little life when we can pause,
Pause For Thought.

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations Review

Angels

Since dipping in and out of Lorna Byrne’s book, Angels in my Hair, I can say that I believe in angels. Think I’m daft? Hear me out.

My Grandad once said that: “all the good things you do in the world for other people are rewarded. Perhaps you don’t recognise the rewards because they do not come in material benefits; it might be a good feeling or the experience of just having a day when everything is going your way.” This is a quote that I cling on to and one that perfectly portrays my version of angels.

In Byrne’s book she describes various situations that could have ended horrifically yet didn’t due to something stopping the worse case scenario as if by chance. A girl doesn’t go out into the road to save her getting hit by the car; angels can be seen when Lorna goes on a shopping trip to Moore Street and her mother is told of a rotten apple within the ones she was about to buy; the angel Elijah even warns Lorna about her friend Joe’s impending disease.

Of course, these could all simply be luck playing its way into the lives of these fortunate few, however, and I strongly believe, if you think of it as angels preventing awful things happening, angels watching over us all constantly on the lookout, then life suddenly becomes that bit more magical.

I frequently drive up to traffic lights that instantly turn green (especially when I am in a rush) and look above briefly to thank the angels. The other day a coat was on sale, one left and in my size, I absolutely love it and each time I wear it I give thanks to the angels. While walking home alone in the dark and feeling (unnecessarily scared) I feel safer knowing that the angels are all around. When I get stressed and angry I take a moment to quietly ask the angels for strength to be a good person.

Too often in life we focus on the negative. If we are having a bad day then every tiny thing that goes wrong is the most awful thing in the world, angering us beyond measure. Yet if we have the same attitude to good things, as small as they may be, it can have a huge impact on our mood. By viewing these nuggets of goodness as angels being around, brings me more happiness and strength each day while muddling through life.

Mock me if you wish and it is a very personal belief (a very personal version of what to others might differ but still be angels) but if you feel inclined to learn more or would like an incredibly interesting read, certainly get your hands on Lorna Byrne’s book, it’s insightful and warming in every way.

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

I read because…

I read because I’m inspired

I read because I learn from it

I read because it gives me ideas

I read to relax

I read because it takes me to good places

I read because I love it

I read because it helps me sleep

I read because I slow down

I read because it shuts my head off

I read because I usually have a dog on my lap

I read because of imagination

I read because of invented worlds

I read because I want to know things

I read because it’s good for me

I read because I am lucky to be able to

I read for enjoyment

Categories
Adulthood fiction Stories Writing

The Disagreement

Jane and Oliver knew that they were late for lunch at the new pub that opened in the village last night, but they couldn’t leave during the debate. Both of them were very excited to try the new menu and see how the place had been transformed from its old ragged self into a shiny new upmarket venue. Yet they also didn’t want the onlooking villagers to gossip over their table mannerisms showing quite opaquely the row that they had prior to arriving.

He’s certainly having an affair with the accountant, the rumours would begin, Jane knew the village too well. They had to settle it before leaving the house.

‘Look, all I’m saying is that he would be much better off in a care home. It’s for the best,’ Oliver said with the same irritatingly calming tone that he always used during arguments.

‘What if it was your father? Would you be happy just to lock him away?’

‘Jane, it’s not a case of locking him away. We will visit him all the time and some of the homes are luxury these days. To be honest I’d prefer to stay in them rather than a posh hotel.’

The playful shift in Oliver’s manner wasn’t reciprocated by Jane who merely stared at him disapprovingly.

‘I’d personally want to live my last years in my own space, my own home, without old folk making me feel twenty years older than I am. He’s not even ill!’

‘Jane, we’ve been through this.’

‘Don’t.’

Holding back the tears, Jane soon realised that lunch was going to have to wait until another day.

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

The Write Diet

Today is a good day because today I was told that I look slimmer! This is possibly the BEST compliment you could give to me EVER. Well, for today anyway.

I’m not vain, I’m just a typical girl; always wanting to be prettier, thinner, funnier etc. Since January I have been on a very half arsed version of what most would call a “diet”. In other words, I try not to eat the entire packet of Haribo followed by a two course meal and pudding. Here are some pointers from a very amateur dietitian.

  1. My desk is usually filled with unhealthy delights. Munchies are often found there, crisps, biscuits, fizzy drinks, tins of baked beans with sausages in (the best!!!!) – you name it, my desk contained it. Of course, to a certain extent this is OK and everything is fine in moderation (to quote the old adage) but this was also something I knew I could easily cut out.

    Working at a shop that sells all of these things, I found it hard clocking off from a six hour shift and heading to do some more (writing) work not to carry a selection of goodies with me. One word – WILLPOWER! That’s all it takes. By skipping the extra chocolate bar, the bag of crisps or the fizzy drink, I have not only lost a few pounds but also felt much better for it. Take a piece of fruit, drink water, there are always plenty of answers.
  2. Another huge helping factor in my (poor) efforts to maintain a lesser weight and become generally healthier has been AFD. Alcohol Free Days. Monday and Tuesday nights are, for me, (mostly) free. Occasionally I convince myself that a Gin & Tonic contains hardly any calories so what does it matter, but mostly I avoid the good stuff and feel slightly better, enjoying a huge glass when Wednesday evening comes around.
  3. Yoga is another part of my newly improved health and fitness regime and it is something that I have been fairly consistent at. Whether it’s the notion of the first alcoholic beverage of the week after class, or the sheer relaxation that I get from every session, I’m unsure. All I know is that I love it!
  4. I also try to walk everywhere that I can. My motto is if the distance can be reached on foot, then on foot I shall go. I ensure that I go on a half hour dog walk daily but I also make a conscious effort to walk wherever else I can. I am lucky in that my work is walking distance away as are many of my social events, but by walking that bit more and faster I am noticing healthier lungs as well as a healthier waistline.

Editing this post some time on I can safely say that I am by NO MEANS an expert in all of this. Today is Tuesday. I drank half a bottle of white last night, I plan to drink this evening and so far in October I have attended zero yoga classes because instead of the healthy option of Stoptober (quitting booze for a month) I have decided to STOP yoga.

Nobody’s perfect, right?

Categories
Adulthood Observations Writing

The different versions of you

You are an individual, of course you are, just like nobody else. You could be happy one day and another day sad but you’ll still do it differently to everyone. As important as it is to be you and the best version of it that you can be, I still think we all have numerous very different versions of what this is.

There’s the work one. The I must be polite to everyone one. The musn’t swear no matter how better it will make me feel one. The must work hard even though I am so tired one.

There’s the play one. The swear as much as you like one. The drink as much as you can one. The no regrets until morning one.

There’s the meeting old friends one. The can’t stop talking and who needs to take breath anyway one. The so much to catch up on so the conversation is meaningful one.

There’s the friend you see every day one. The still can’t allow for breath but talking about nothing one. The let’s have another glass and talk more rubbish one.

There’s the happiness around dogs one. The forgiving for everything one. The being delighted no matter how bad they are being one – because who can be sad around dogs?

There’s the holiday one. The off duty one. The nothing matters how long it takes one. The I don’t care about organisation I have all the time in the world one. The no cares at all one.

There’s the mundane day one. The I have an hour to do everything so I’m going to stress about it all one. The getting home and listing all the things that I’ve stressed about and laughing it off in the car one.

There’s the crisis one. The everything is such a HUGE deal one. The how can I possibly cope one. The screaming at the top of my lungs while driving down country roads one.

There’s the reasoning one. The logical one. The irritatingly calm one. Jumping in when chaos has struck one.

For me, personally, there’s the questioning one. The querying all that I’m doing and all I’ve ever done one. Wondering if I’ll ever get married, find success, where I’ll end up one. The somewhat dramatic one.

Then there’s the writer in me. The fighter in me. The never giving upper in me. The I am happy, the stop worrying about the future, the keep going, pour another gin.

They may appear to be very different people, but I feel that these are all versions of one you.

Categories
Adulthood Observations Writing

20 ways that my full time job enhances my creative ambition

Having attended university and obtained an above average degree, people often ask me what’s next. I sometimes think that because they can’t physically see the results of my writing and where it could lead, they feel that I go home and do nothing or that I haven’t much ambition at all.

As good as I’ve got at not feeling the need to justify myself anymore, I won’t. Instead, I will tell you all of the wonderful ways that having my full time job at a Post Office and Stores enhances my creative ambition.

  1. It brings new ideas from the situations I encounter
  2. It enhances the personalities of my characters through the variety of people I meet
  3. Providing a break from my desk work is SO HELPFUL
  4. As is earning money so I’m not stressed while I write, since I don’t earn too much from writing yet
  5. It provides another purpose on days when writing isn’t happening
  6. I find so much blog material through working with people
  7. I have many positive chats through my working days about what I am deciding to do
  8. Peers are always interested and encouraging in my slightly off-piste approach, as we chat over the preparation of a bacon sandwich
  9. Hearing how others have overcome hurdles in life and ended up as successful as they are now provides a huge boost
  10. I add to my skill set outside of writing, learning new things every day (including managing the little time that I have to write effectively!)
  11. I get support from customers
  12. I get support from colleagues
  13. I get support from my bosses
  14. Free (amazing, thank you) proofreaders
  15. Advice
  16. Connections
  17. Book recommendations
  18. Opportunities
  19. Inspiration
  20. Happiness
Categories
Adulthood Observations

30 things I appreciate as I become more adult

Whether it is down to working more than full time for over a year now, working with the general public or venturing deeper and deeper into the wonderful world of adulthood, I have noticed that I appreciate certain things a lot more nowadays than I have done in the past. Here are thirty of them…

  1. Time to myself
  2. Time with loved ones
  3. Time
  4. Not talking
  5. Books
  6. Eating meals with no interruption
  7. Logical people
  8. Lay ins
  9. Writing
  10. Being outside
  11. Dog walks
  12. The sea
  13. Quiet
  14. Wine
  15. Good/ honest/ true people
  16. Music
  17. Days off and plan free weekends!
  18. Cups of tea
  19. Nature
  20. Advice
  21. My calendar and diary
  22. The cinema/ theatre (shutting off)
  23. Early morning birdsong
  24. Gin & Tonic
  25. Photos & Videos (memories)
  26. Long drives
  27. 5 positives a day
  28. The changing seasons
  29. Time out
  30. Candles

Categories
Adulthood

Go compare, we compare

I found myself the other day reading a friends notebook. It is from thirty years ago when she was the age I am now and I was reading it on a Friday night. I was shattered from the week and had consumed enough wine to sink a large ship, but decided against the pub. There I was thirty years on and thinking “I should be out. I should be doing what she was doing in 1986. I shouldn’t be sitting in bed about to get stuck into another chapter of my book. What is wrong with me?”

Why?

I’m the worst for comparing myself to others and thinking that I should be doing this or shouldn’t be doing that, but the above scenario inspired this blog post because my thought process was ridiculous! Nobody is telling me that I should be out on a Friday night – well, they do if I stay in and tell me I should stay in if I go out – but for some reason I felt a wave of comparison wash over me.

Social media is a huge problem on this front because I could be having a lazy weekend after a hectic week at work and a long string of busy weekends when I see on my friends’ insta-stories that they’re out at some festival or a party on a boat. At that point the FOMO kicks in, bad.

Yet I never get sad when someone is engaged or upset when I hear another friend has landed themselves a cracking new job in London, so I’m certainly not saying that social media is totally to blame. No, in these circumstances I’m very happy for them being a positive take on the new virtual platform that takes up so much of our lives. It does remind me though of what I’m not doing and for a minute – occasionally longer – makes me question the route I am choosing to take so again I start to compare.

The mind is a crazy thing!

I think the message I am taking away from my thoughts is to care less (easier said than done). To care so much about others and be happy for them in everything that they do but to care less in comparison to myself.

Yes, I am 24. I love to party, I often get too drunk and fall over, I love wine, I adore day drinking in the sun and sometimes I kiss multiple guys at once or flirt with them purely to get a drink.

Madness!

However, I also love sleep, get tired, enjoy time to myself, nights in, quiet days, radio 4, reading, long drives, country music.

Basically I am human and don’t necessarily follow the crowd of my peers. Whether it is right for my age or wrong, it is what I enjoy so I am going to keep on doing it.

Most people don’t judge and mostly it is all inside my head. It’s either that or they judge to a hilarious level and one week say I should be doing one thing then the next I should be doing the total opposite.

At the end of the day, and in the words of an (very) old singer who’s song I like – it’s MY LIFE – go ahead with your own life and leave me alone!

Categories
Adulthood

14 small snippets of life advice from a rookie…

never start a day without a caffeinated beverage

toe nails look better painted

avoid replying to a text or beginning a new text conversation after getting into bed at night or getting out of it in the morning, particularly if it’s risky, your head won’t be in the right place

always have a glass of water by your bed (especially if you’ve been drinking alcohol)

in-date milk is a staple to your fridge contents and an ingredient to tea, and tea is life

always make time to read, listen to music and learn new things from interesting people

stop, breathe and think before immediately turning to anger

hold onto memories – take lots of pictures, keep a diary or pin them down somehow

notice the little things all around you; the birdsong, the colours, the smell of the air

if it is sunny, GET OUTSIDE

sometimes (a lot of the time) it’s better to say absolutely nothing

listen to those with more experience than yourself

always have a supply of chocolate/ wine

whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy