Category: Non-fiction

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Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

‘It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see’ – Henry David Thoreau

A quote to live by. Quoted in a book that should live by your bedside. Midnight Library by Matt Haig.

It makes you think, doesn’t it?

So often in life we see things differently to how other people see them. Things, words, situations can all be interpreted in various ways and it is important to establish this.

There has been so many times in my own life when I have thought something or taken what someone has said a certain way and not until I openly spoke with them about it did I realise that I had got it entirely wrong.

Or I’ve seen something as totally negative and the end of the world then on speaking with someone about it, they flip the entire thing on its head to make it totally positive and brilliant. Not the huge disaster I had it down as.

The picture above is of the sea and one of my favourite places to be. This is for many reasons but one main one is that being by the sea forces perspective on me. If I’m stood looking out into the ocean I can feel how tiny me and my problems are within this big beautiful world. It pushes me to look at things a different way. Flip them on their head.

Perspective is beautiful.

We all need to remind ourselves of it, ground ourselves with it and remember the quote above.

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is OUT NOW. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey as I self-publish novel number two, then please subscribe to my newsletter by filling in the form at the bottom of any page of my website. Thank you x

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Adulthood Non-fiction

A line a day during a pandemic

Written on July 5th 2020

I’ve not written in here since May 24th and I’m surprised I lasted that long to be honest. Each day has been a repeat of the one before and I am exhausted with it all quite frankly. The news is just so depressing. I have found a good series – This is Us – which we watch each night and Kaf and I are loving (Mike not so much!) also my 200-word piece got accepted in a lockdown anthology. Good books keep me going at weekends. I saw my first woodpecker the other night. It was beautiful. It’s not all bad.

Note to self and all of you – there’s always beauty, good, light, even in the middle of a global pandemic.

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is OUT NOW. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey as I self-publish novel number two, then please subscribe to my newsletter by filling in the form at the bottom of any page of my website. Thank you x

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Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

A global pandemic and a trip to the dentist

Like many others, I hadn’t been to the dentist for well over a year. In fact, when I asked my dentist on arrival into the room when I was last seen she told me it was November 2019.

I paused a moment to consider all that had happened in the time between visits. My gosh. A global pandemic. Nature taking over as the world stops. Numerous lockdowns. Restrictions on our lives that still remain. Mask wearing. No hugging. Lots of wine consumption. Relentless working. No holidays. The same news on repeat.

I was sure to have many cavities.

I didn’t expect to be so anxious about my first visit to the dentist. However, on the drive there which is about forty minutes, I tried to soften my anxiety with a podcast. I was in fact quite worried.

I’d read on the email the procedure to expect which wasn’t much different from going to a supermarket. Wear a mask at all times, except from when they are examining you, obviously. Take your own pen to sign. Sit away from others in the waiting room. They might take your temperature.

Well, that started a hole heap of worries.

What if I appear hot because I am running late and then I have to get tested and realise I actually have COVID-19? What if they find something horrendously wrong inside my mouth because I haven’t been seen for so long? In fact I think I can feel a root canal is needed at the back. Yep, definitely.

None of this was true of course and, by some miracle, I had no holes. The whole procedure was smooth and I couldn’t fault the surgery at all. They made me feel very comfortable, extremely safe and I was smug that I hadn’t got to go back for any work. It would have been a long wait if I needed anything done.

Until next time. I wonder what will happen in this crazy world between now and then. I wonder if I will be thinking the same as I sit in that chair next year.

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is available on Amazon along with the sequel Don’t Tell Jack. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey, then please subscribe to my newsletter by dropping your name and email. There will be plenty of giveaways, news hot off the press and an honest insight into life as an author. Thank you x

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Adulthood Non-fiction Stories

The People’s Postcode Lottery got me two more books!

I work at a place that demonstrates the uniqueness of people. Sometimes we have problems to solve, but mostly days are spent chatting to lovely people who come along to our shop and Post Office for varying reasons. I think lots of the time recently, particularly among the elderly, the trip is the first time they’ve left the house in a year!

Either way I feel our conversations help in some way.

The other day a lady I hadn’t seen in a long time came to me in the Post Office. It sounded like she’d had an eventful year. We chatted and I felt the sigh of relief lift off her to be chatting to someone in person. No screens besides that of the Post Office sorting her banking out. Her family live at the other end of the country so it’s been virtual contact for too long, she was saying.

Anyway she was telling me about one lucky aspect to her recent days in that she’d won on the People’s Postcode Lottery three times. £10 each time, but a win is a win. Not bad as luck goes. The latest win was for a book. She doesn’t read anymore so she gave me her prize.

How lovely. How kind.

Thanks to this lady, her luck, her generosity and her desire to have a real chat with a real person, I am now the happy owner of A Keeper by Graham Norton and I Owe You One by Sophie Kinsella. Yeah I found the two for one deal!

I will be posting reviews in due course.

There are good people in this world.

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is OUT NOW. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey as I self-publish novel number two, then please subscribe to my newsletter by filling in the form at the bottom of any page of my website. Thank you x

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Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

Take another minute, always

One of my bugbears is always being in a rush. Or, more accurately, trying to cram so much into the little time I have that I end up running about trying to fit it all in. Stressing.

Take this morning for example. I start work at 10. I woke at 7:30. In the time between I have fit in:

  • a twenty minute workout
  • breakfast
  • a shower
  • 4 blog posts
  • feeding the cats, the dog and the birds
  • filling in the work health and safety sheet

All done in a panic because I am constantly against the ticking of the clock.

Why do I do it?!

Though I do feel good when it’s done.

The other week I was at the caravan. My favourite place. I had given myself an extra night there which is always lovely and aimed to leave at around 10:30 in the morning to get back in time for work. To get back in time for work with a little bit of time at the other end of the journey to casually bring my bags in, put a wash on and ensure the dog has a pee.

STOP!

Of course my mind went into timetable mode and I had allowed myself until 9:20.a.m. (pretty generous if you ask me). That’s right, I’d allowed myself free time to read in bed, chill, walk on the beach and enjoy the last morning before tidying up and leaving.

9:20 soon came around and I had about twenty pages left of my book that I was loving.

Do you know what I did? I took another minute. And you should too, always.

It felt amazing just to say: “sod it I will finish my book, what’s the worst that could happen?” I doubt I’d be late for work. I felt good after having finished the book. That feeling is wonderful and so much more wonderful than shutting the covers with twenty pages left to go.

I wasn’t going overboard. It wasn’t another day or even hour I was giving myself. Just a minute. A short period of time that left me feeling so smug and so fabulous.

Just one minute, always.

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is OUT NOW 

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

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Adulthood Non-fiction

Music through the decades

There’s this thing that I do most nights and it began in early 2020. That thing is drink. Wine mostly, sometimes beer but usually it involves alcohol.

As the weeks close and another Sunday is ready to be enjoyed I release a little on a Saturday evening and find myself getting drunker quicker. It’s lovely. I think it’s because the weight of the working week lifts and the excitement for a lie in begins to build.

Two magnesium tablets, a bucket full of red and I felt ready for bed the other week when I started doing this other thing. As I went to brush my teeth I put random songs on Spotify. I had overplayed the current tracks throughout the week that I wanted to take it back down memory lane. And back I went.

2016…

2013…

2009…

2007… I had totally forgotten about Nizlopi JCB! Tune!

I was loving life, smiling at memories and enjoying hearing songs I had totally forgotten about. I think it wasn’t until two hours later that I finished brushing my teeth!

Now if ever I can’t decide what to listen to, which is happening frequently, I do this. Music through the decades, try it. It’s fun!

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is OUT NOW. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey as I self-publish novel number two, then please subscribe to my newsletter by filling in the form at the bottom of any page of my website. Thank you x

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Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

If the dilemma is other’s opinions, it’s not your dilemma

After four long months I have finally spent a weekend at the beach – yipee! Oh how I loved it. I’ve written about this magical place before and each time I visit, I grow to love it more. The peaceful feeling, the space, freedom, chilled vibes, everything that makes life great.

From the moment I turn on my ignition in my car, I smile from within every time I go to this place. The journey is part of the bliss and I treasure every second. Sometimes I choose to listen to my favourite music, sometimes I let Spotify choose and other times it’s podcasts or a chat show that I am feeling more. This time I chose podcasts – On Wednesday’s We Drink Wine. Check it out.

The podcast is very new to the mix and is hosted by Made In Chelsea stars Sophie Habboo and Melissa Tattum. The girls basically chat and drink wine. It does what it says on the tin and because they are the same age as me and love wine as much as me, I knew I could relate. I wasn’t wrong.

As they go they have certain features that will appear in each episode and one of these features is a dilemma section. During this they each pick a dilemma that a listener has sent in. Mostly these are relationship related because, let’s face it, that’s what’s on many 26 year old/ humans minds often and they respond with their opinions on the situation. I agreed with most. It was easy listening.

Then it struck me.

Do I have a dilemma?

I’m 26 years old and haven’t experienced many of these struggles faced. Boyfriends wanting open relationships, not posting me on social media, feeling so jealous that I could kill and so on.

Is that my dilemma? Should I ask them about it?

Then I stopped and asked myself if I am happy. The answer is yes. I then went further and asked how I would put it to them. Every time I tried to phrase it, the dilemma part of the situation was all down to other people’s opinions. Because people might find me weird; because it isn’t normal to be single for so long; because guys may question my motive if I were to find someone I felt I wanted to be in a long-term relationship with; because I won’t have anything to bring to the table when girl friends moan about their fellas. Blah. Blah. Blah.

Am I happy? Yes. Is this my dilemma? No.

If the problem becomes a problem purely based on other people’s opinions and when you remove that factor it is no longer a problem, then it was never YOUR problem in the first place.

FACT. IMO of course 😉

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is OUT NOW!!

https://linktr.ee/HJMWriting

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Adulthood Non-fiction Observations Writing

My writing and me

I write for all sorts of reasons.

It might be to get something off my chest; to keep a record of my days; to entertain others; to remember what I need to buy from the supermarket; an idea that turns into a short story and everything in between. Writing is everywhere for me and a very useful tool in so many ways.

I was writing my diary earlier and loved the fact that my words weren’t going to be published anywhere. They weren’t for social media, nor were they to be put in a novel or a blog post. Instead they were just for me. Not that my diary entries are ever secretive, or very interesting for that matter, I just felt free in the fact that my words were for me.

On the flip side of that I love to write for others.

I get a buzz out of people engaging with my posts. I love to hear that I’ve phrased something how someone wanted to put it but couldn’t find the words. Often I feel proud or happy when I read back on a particular blog post that has gained more feedback than usual. There are even some lines in my novel that I can’t believe I wrote!

I always think long and hard about text messages. I find myself on walks feeling appreciative of friends. Then I write a message to put in a card or a text. People always need to know how valued they are and I love to tell them. Sometimes friends thank me for advice and I wonder if I was right in saying what I did. I usually think that the person seeking advice knew already they just liked how I phrased it.

I’ve written a lot of articles lately about the same thing and have welcomed the positive feedback. Articles, of course, referring to my debut novel and I don’t shut up about it! Some readers have said how my writing shows my passion or that it gripped them from the beginning and throughout.

I love and enjoy writing from others as well. Each year I keep cards from my birthday with particularly lovely messages or important notes inside. I have a friend who writes the most lovely labels on birthday presents (from the dogs) and I keep them all. Often I find myself screenshotting words on social media that I think people have put so brilliantly.

I read, LOTS.

Basically I love words. That folks is my writing and me.

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is OUT NOW 🙂

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

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Adulthood Non-fiction Writing

One of those days

At the time of thinking about this blog post idea I was having one of those days. You know the kind. Behind before you’ve even started. Don’t know how you’ll fit everything in.

Since then my one of those days has turned into one of those weeks. Months even. Hence the lack of blog posts in March.

The nature of my job results in there being very rarely any spare time. Therefore when I’m asked, which I am fairly often, how I fit in my writing on top I struggle to understand it myself. I sort of finish a novel and think how did that happen? Obviously there is pressure and stress that comes with it but once I have the full manuscript written I think wow, I’m not too sure how that happened. It just does.

The trouble is that once the manuscript is complete and even published, the work doesn’t stop there. No, people need to know about your novel else how are they going to buy it?! That is where extra work comes in the form of social media posts, blogs, newspaper and magazine articles and everything in between.

This day was one of those days.

I was working until close but had been asked to write an article. My close is 5:30pm. The deadline for the article was 6pm. Latest.

EEK.

As usual my mind was going mad with ideas and my notes app on my phone were getting well used. This is the norm. Even after a random conversation I might get an idea for a blog post or even a novel and have to note it down before I forget. This becomes slightly difficult when I’ve had a few glasses of wine and I have to translate my badly spelled sentences.

Anyway.

Among serving customers and generally doing everything that work entails in a day that is too short (every day is too short) I came up with the bones of an article. I think we finished with about ten minutes to spare so I opened my laptop and typed faster than ever before.

Thank God for spell check.

All blog posts can be found at https://www.harrietmills.co.uk/ and to read my published work visit my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is out now.

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Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

As good as it gets – the supermarket

We are all very used to the idea of a trip to the supermarket being as good as it gets. Especially for the past few months it has been about all we have been legitimately allowed to do. No longer do conversations go:

“How was your week off?”

“Great, we went to Spain. It was fab.”

Instead they are more like:

“What have you been up to?”

“Quite a lot actually, I went to B&M followed by Tesco. I might pop into Sainsbury’s later.”

I know my weekly trip out of my village mostly involves a supermarket visit, collecting bits for elderly customers that we don’t sell at the shop, gathering my weekly supply of wine, seeing what other unhealthy snacks I can add to my growing stock. I’ll never lose those lockdown pounds!

It’s thrilling.

I remember in lockdown number one a year ago I went out to the supermarket for the first time after five weeks of not leaving my village. My days were just work, wine, sleep and repeat. My car somehow started which goes against all of the problems I have had with the battery since and off I went down the road. It felt so peculiar driving, leaving the village and then going in the supermarket for the first time with COVID restrictions.

Before this trip I’d never experienced queuing to get in, only entering on a green light and sanitising my hands, keys, phone and trolley before setting foot through the door. Now it is all so familiar.

However, the other day I drove to a supermarket slightly further away so that my car got a bit more of a run (battery lockdown problems) and I felt flat about going to the supermarket.

The trip that for so long has been a release. That which has been headspace away from work. A task that isn’t that difficult. No major thinking is required yet I felt flat, unwilling and totally couldn’t be bothered to trudge around yet another selection of aisles getting the same old goods and abiding by all the extra rules.

It felt difficult. I was lost. My mind was freaking out about the check tyre pressure sign coming up on my car when usually I’d just register it and carry on. It felt like the biggest problem. For a second I hated this way of living.

Mostly I’m of the opinion that everyone is in the same boat and we’re all in it together. You know, all of Bojo’s slogans in one. But on this day I felt a hint of frustration and anger. Pointless but true. I think it got on top of me and then I couldn’t find the Kievs!

So that’s my story of a recent mini meltdown. I’m writing it to you all for no other reason that to connect with others who have also experienced temporary inner screaming matches relating to this pandemic. Sometimes you just have to let it go…

All blog posts can be found at https://www.harrietmills.co.uk/ and to read my published work visit my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is out now.

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