Tag: pandemic

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Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

In case anyone is interested…

In case anyone is interested, I am a little nervous

About the easing of restrictions and the opening of the world again.

In case anyone is interested, I can’t get fully excited

About social events, big events, because there is always the risk looming.

In case anyone is interested, I may still wear a mask

To protect others, to protect me, to feel safer and secure in environments.

Environments we’ve not experienced ‘normally’ in well over a year

In case anyone is interest, I am going to take it steady

With life, in work in all that I do.

In case anyone is interested, I am going to allow

Allow for tiredness, feeling intimidated, overwhelmed, all of those feelings that come with this.

This thing we are living through that nobody quite understands

In case anyone is interested, I get it

I get why the government feel there is no other option, why now is time.

At some point we have to move on, to continue, to live with it

In case anyone is interested, I find writing therapeutic

So much creativity will come out of these times, some bad some good.

In case anyone is interested, I will always remember

These times, those lost, key workers, inspirations along the way.

If you’re not interested, that’s fine. Move on.

If you are please stay, I have lots to say!

(blogging weekly, Instagramming even more)

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is OUT NOW. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey as I self-publish novel number two, then please subscribe to my newsletter by filling in the form at the bottom of any page of my website. Thank you x

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Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction

A line a day during a pandemic

Written on July 5th 2020

I’ve not written in here since May 24th and I’m surprised I lasted that long to be honest. Each day has been a repeat of the one before and I am exhausted with it all quite frankly. The news is just so depressing. I have found a good series – This is Us – which we watch each night and Kaf and I are loving (Mike not so much!) also my 200-word piece got accepted in a lockdown anthology. Good books keep me going at weekends. I saw my first woodpecker the other night. It was beautiful. It’s not all bad.

Note to self and all of you – there’s always beauty, good, light, even in the middle of a global pandemic.

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is OUT NOW. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey as I self-publish novel number two, then please subscribe to my newsletter by filling in the form at the bottom of any page of my website. Thank you x

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

A global pandemic and a trip to the dentist

Like many others, I hadn’t been to the dentist for well over a year. In fact, when I asked my dentist on arrival into the room when I was last seen she told me it was November 2019.

I paused a moment to consider all that had happened in the time between visits. My gosh. A global pandemic. Nature taking over as the world stops. Numerous lockdowns. Restrictions on our lives that still remain. Mask wearing. No hugging. Lots of wine consumption. Relentless working. No holidays. The same news on repeat.

I was sure to have many cavities.

I didn’t expect to be so anxious about my first visit to the dentist. However, on the drive there which is about forty minutes, I tried to soften my anxiety with a podcast. I was in fact quite worried.

I’d read on the email the procedure to expect which wasn’t much different from going to a supermarket. Wear a mask at all times, except from when they are examining you, obviously. Take your own pen to sign. Sit away from others in the waiting room. They might take your temperature.

Well, that started a hole heap of worries.

What if I appear hot because I am running late and then I have to get tested and realise I actually have COVID-19? What if they find something horrendously wrong inside my mouth because I haven’t been seen for so long? In fact I think I can feel a root canal is needed at the back. Yep, definitely.

None of this was true of course and, by some miracle, I had no holes. The whole procedure was smooth and I couldn’t fault the surgery at all. They made me feel very comfortable, extremely safe and I was smug that I hadn’t got to go back for any work. It would have been a long wait if I needed anything done.

Until next time. I wonder what will happen in this crazy world between now and then. I wonder if I will be thinking the same as I sit in that chair next year.

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is available on Amazon along with the sequel Don’t Tell Jack. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey, then please subscribe to my newsletter by dropping your name and email. There will be plenty of giveaways, news hot off the press and an honest insight into life as an author. Thank you x

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

As good as it gets – the supermarket

We are all very used to the idea of a trip to the supermarket being as good as it gets. Especially for the past few months it has been about all we have been legitimately allowed to do. No longer do conversations go:

“How was your week off?”

“Great, we went to Spain. It was fab.”

Instead they are more like:

“What have you been up to?”

“Quite a lot actually, I went to B&M followed by Tesco. I might pop into Sainsbury’s later.”

I know my weekly trip out of my village mostly involves a supermarket visit, collecting bits for elderly customers that we don’t sell at the shop, gathering my weekly supply of wine, seeing what other unhealthy snacks I can add to my growing stock. I’ll never lose those lockdown pounds!

It’s thrilling.

I remember in lockdown number one a year ago I went out to the supermarket for the first time after five weeks of not leaving my village. My days were just work, wine, sleep and repeat. My car somehow started which goes against all of the problems I have had with the battery since and off I went down the road. It felt so peculiar driving, leaving the village and then going in the supermarket for the first time with COVID restrictions.

Before this trip I’d never experienced queuing to get in, only entering on a green light and sanitising my hands, keys, phone and trolley before setting foot through the door. Now it is all so familiar.

However, the other day I drove to a supermarket slightly further away so that my car got a bit more of a run (battery lockdown problems) and I felt flat about going to the supermarket.

The trip that for so long has been a release. That which has been headspace away from work. A task that isn’t that difficult. No major thinking is required yet I felt flat, unwilling and totally couldn’t be bothered to trudge around yet another selection of aisles getting the same old goods and abiding by all the extra rules.

It felt difficult. I was lost. My mind was freaking out about the check tyre pressure sign coming up on my car when usually I’d just register it and carry on. It felt like the biggest problem. For a second I hated this way of living.

Mostly I’m of the opinion that everyone is in the same boat and we’re all in it together. You know, all of Bojo’s slogans in one. But on this day I felt a hint of frustration and anger. Pointless but true. I think it got on top of me and then I couldn’t find the Kievs!

So that’s my story of a recent mini meltdown. I’m writing it to you all for no other reason that to connect with others who have also experienced temporary inner screaming matches relating to this pandemic. Sometimes you just have to let it go…

All blog posts can be found at https://www.harrietmills.co.uk/ and to read my published work visit my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is out now.

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Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

SPRING has almost sprung and so has our gloominess

…out of the way!

Let’s face it, the past year has been full of doom and gloom. Everywhere. It has been relentless. Keyworkers are on their knees without much energy left to continue. Those who have been shielding long to see the outdoors. People on furlough are praying they still have a job at the end of it all. Dogs are praying that their owners never have to go to work again.

News. We can’t get away from it. It is the main topic of every day conversations because we don’t have much else to say. It is hard to plan because we must rely on data that we currently don’t have. We are still very much living through the pandemic.

Not only has Boris’ announcement on Monday brought a wave of optimism into this otherwise shit show, but the weather seems to have brightened with the news. Working last Saturday was almost like a spring day and I nearly didn’t take my coat with me for a dog walk after.

We all know having lived through a number of lockdown situations now that staying home in the summer is a lot more pleasant than during January and February. They are the worst months of the year in normal circumstances let alone lockdown during a global pandemic.

I think usually we aren’t aware of the sluggish feeling that comes with getting through these two months. March arrives and we instantly feel better unaware that we were feeling bad before. This year that feeling has been ever present and the thought of March and spring and sunshine and birds and being outdoors feels like heaven on earth.

Well. I’m pleased to say that this feeling certainly came a week early and the weather has boosted the country. It’s brighter, lighter, the birds are louder, people’s smiles are bigger, everyone is outside.

Long may it last!

All blog posts can be found at https://www.harrietmills.co.uk/ and to read my published work visit my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is out now.

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Adulthood Non-fiction Observations Recommendations

My Lockdown day

I haven’t really experienced lockdown in true stay-at-home-for-days-weeks-months-on-end style. I go to work six days a week, try to lay in on my one day off and usually wake up at 5 a.m. due to my body’s inability to break the routine. Today (it is a Sunday, I am writing this on a Sunday but when I post it most probably won’t be a Sunday) I questioned whether I would have enough time if I were to experience true lockdown. Enough time to fit everything in.

I say this partly in jest as I do realise that many people out there are seriously struggling with the endless hours during the never-ending weeks of lockdown 3, but today was an example of me adoring some time to myself.

I had already decided, having sent off my second novel to the publishers mid-week, that I wasn’t going to pick up my laptop and do anything regarding further editing of said novel or writing of the third. In fact, I wasn’t going to do any writing at all and here I am…

Blogs are fun and the ideas buzz around my head like an irritating fly so sometimes I just have to get them down.

I digress.

Today was going to be a day for me. I finished work at around 5 p.m. yesterday evening and chilled out with beers and Saturday night TV. Just before bed, as is often the case, my head began to spin with ideas of things to do on my Sunday off.

Throughout the week I always see things on social media etc that I note down to watch or listen to. It might be a podcast, a video interview, an article, a book, a film, a TV programme… I rarely find the time in the week and if I begin watching in the evening I have usually had too many wines to stay awake and finish watching/ listening/ reading anyway.

My list for this Sunday went something like this:

  • A video interview by Dawn O’Porter with Kate Winslet (Conversations at home SAG-AFTRA Foundation, I found on her Patreon channel)
  • A video interview by Dawn O’Porter with Jason Segel (Conversations at home SAG-AFTRA Foundation, again on her Patreon channel)
  • Finish reading Demi Moore’s Inside Out, a memoir
  • An interview with Marian Keyes on Laura Whitmore’s BBC 5 Live show (Found on BBC Sounds App)
  • An hour on the exercise bike (needed)
  • Two walks

I mean, I’ve done it! I loved every single moment of it. Yet when walking with my sister this morning and listing aloud all that I planned to do that day, I never thought I would complete it. Chill, I kept inwardly telling myself. Chill out and stop cramming so much in.

I love days like this becasue I consume lots. I learn lots. Even if I’m not consciously listening or watching I somehow take it in. Exercise makes me feel good especially when I have the time. And none of it – NONE OF IT – is work or pandemic related. Everything is removed from my life but also enhances it. It gives me such a sense of meaningful escape.

I have no other reason for writing this post other than to give others some good suggestions of material to consume while in lockdown. That and the idea for this post was running over in my head on loop so I needed to get it down.

During this week, in my continuation of listening to Laura Whitmore’s podcast, Castaway while on the exercise bike, I have also added Emma Gannon’s Ctrl Alt Delete (podcast) and In Writing with Hattie Crisell (podcast) for all my fellow writers.

You are welcome.

All blog posts can be found at https://www.harrietmills.co.uk/ and to read my published work visit my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is out now.

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Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

My Lockdown Google.

I think at some point this year we’ve all been in one or more of these places… GOOGLE THE CONFUSION! Here goes…

Nearest OPEN takeaway near me…

How to wear a Facemask…

Which face coverings are acceptable?

Is it acceptable to guide others on how to wear a face mask?

What are the COVID rules?

Am I allowed to leave my house?

McDonald’s breakfast times…

Weather forecast for Sunday…

Gift ideas for cancelled weddings 🙁

What is the recommended daily alcohol intake?

How many calories in a Corona beer?

What are the current COVID rules?

Am I allowed to leave my house?

Are we going into another lockdown?

Is it all too late?

Is Boris ok?

Does Trump really have Coronavirus?

Is this all a nightmare?

Am I allowed to leave my house?

How to drink tea with a visor on…

How to drink tea in a mask…

Notonthehighstreet

Amazon…BUY NOW

What did I order last night?

Am I allowed to leave my house?

(for retailers) what’s a healthy level of frustration towards someone you don’t know?

Is wine one of your five a day?

Will this ever end?

Local small business gift ideas…

Is wine an essential retailer?

Am I allowed to leave my house?

When will I get the vaccine?

Is there ever going to be any good news?

How long will this go on for?

Why did he eat a bat?

Book recommendations for lockdown?

Netflix best shows…

Is crochet difficult?

How many jigsaws in one year is the record?

Am I allowed to leave my house?

2020, we’ve all googled it!

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

Honesty is the best policy, I hope you agree

Recently I’ve been feeling pretty flat yet frantic. Not drastically so just I’ve felt lower more often than I’ve felt like smiling. Anger has got the better of me and I feel so cross. All of the time.

My head is so busy yet sometimes so empty. My fretting of the future has been amplified. How am I meant to find ‘the one’ when I can’t freely go to the pub!?

I digress.

Two people very close to me were affected by COVID-19 this week, negative tests, but affected nonetheless and it hit home. The reality sunk in.

I then look to the dogs in bed beside me not knowing what’s going on in our world and happily content in theirs. Bliss.

I find it so easy to focus only on tv dramas because the issues displayed are not my own. I can easily zone into books because they too are different worlds away from the dismay of what we are living through. People are hugging, close, enjoying pub life and restaurants without guilt. Enjoying life. Normality.

But then here on our earth there are doctors and nurses in despair. Government in chaos. Decision makers ripping their hair out. Well, any that they have left.

I try to avoid the news. It’s awful. Even for five minutes.

I turn the news on to see people literally crying for their livelihood. Never knowing when it’s going to end. People feeling awful for normal social lovely things like going for a pint or for a pizza. I want to spend a Sunday afternoon enjoying a pub cooked roast and drinking plenty of wine without a tag on to track me! It’s so odd. Everything is practically illegal.

The reality that parents are struggling to put shoes on their children’s feet and food in their mouths is everywhere. It’s a crisis. It’s scary.

I know I shouldn’t feel this way because I have so much when others have so little. I should be grateful and only that. Then I am human, this is where I’m at some of the time. I soon snap out of it but occasionally I think it’s ok to let everything get on top of you, just for one second. Especially during the times we are living through.

I’ve just skipped the frustration out of my bones ready for another day, putting a jolly face on for the public who most probably also feel similar. My favourite time of the day is 6pm, sipping on a beverage in the company of great people, thinking how truly lucky I am.

There’s not too much purpose to this post except therapy for me and hopefully reassurance for others. Hopefully I’ll read over it in 6 months to a year and be happy that things have improved. Massively hopeful.

Until next time.

H x 🙂

All blog posts can be found at https://www.harrietmills.co.uk/ and to read my published work visit my portfolio.

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

2020: shall we all just scream for ice cream?

I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream!

A well known phrase which, while drinking the third beer on my Sunday last week I desperately wanted to perform. I wouldn’t have stopped at the end though. Oh no. I’d have screamed and screamed and screamed until they could hear me, er, somewhere over the pond which indicates a very loud scream.

Yes, disclaimer, I’m a little tipsy writing this one.

It’s all gong a bit mental hasn’t it. I just opened the BBC news app because I’d not had / possibly missed the latest few announcements on coronavirus so wanted to see whether I’m still legally allowed to leave my home.

Wish I hadn’t.

They’re on about the £10,000 fines for disobeying the rules. It’s just gone next level but is any of it working. Like I get staying 2 metres away etc works, but are the tactics on implementing these rules working?

Anyway.

Forth beer now and I’m happy.

Since writing this, the past week has seen further restrictions and now at work we are all in visors. If you told me this time last year I’d be going to work dressed as if I’m about to operate I’d have laughed in ya face! But it’s happening.

A N Y W A Y. . .

I’m writing this partly because I was on a roll while half cut, partly because I find myself kinda funny, partly as a diary. Like a wartime diary, but not. Far from it.

Just gotta keep on keeping on, eating loads and drinking plenty. Christmas all year round. Everyday. We’ve sung about it for years!

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is available on Amazon along with the sequel Don’t Tell Jack. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey, then please subscribe to my newsletter by dropping your name and email. There will be plenty of giveaways, news hot off the press and an honest insight into life as an author. Thank you x

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations Writing

Where’s my 2020 diary?

2020. What even is a diary by this stage?….

I’m a sucker for a page to day diary and, under normal circumstances, would use one all the time. Every task I intend to complete each week is noted down on the day I will complete it. It helps me remain focussed and disciplined with my writing and I highlight my social life to ensure that I still have one.

This year it’s gone out the window.

No really. It possibly could have because I don’t know where it is!

The other morning I phoned the doctors for the first time in forever and booked an appointment. I’m very lucky, I know. Anyway. Although the surgery had sent me a text reminder, I felt the urge to write it in my diary as well.

My diary was nowhere to be seen. It was at this point when I realised I’d stopped bothering to use my diary months ago, I didn’t even know where it was?!

While I strive to continue balancing work and writing, I’ve given in to the fact that this year is like no other and some days I find it quite tough. Work has suddenly picked up again and at the end of last week I didn’t need to look at takings to see how busy we were, I could physically feel it in my aching eyes and wobbling legs. Everything is getting on top of us all again. It’s mental.

This weekend I have plans other than work but I’ve decided to wing it. Who needs a diary? If I put anything big in it’ll probably get cancelled anyway. More friends were meant to get married this month – cancelled.

It gets boring and so depressing for those most effected. Then I think, it’s one year. Whether it’ll be over any time soon is another matter altogether but in the grand scheme of life, it’s not a very long time.

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is available on Amazon along with the sequel Don’t Tell Jack. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey, then please subscribe to my newsletter by dropping your name and email. There will be plenty of giveaways, news hot off the press and an honest insight into life as an author. Thank you x

linktr.ee/HJMWriting