Advice is something we take for granted, sometimes even ignore. I find that I get bits of advice from all sorts of people at varying stages of life and I get it all the time. Although very different, all of the direction that I get is equally helpful and I’ve found myself recently creating a virtual folder in my memory full of pointers to help me.
- Always have a radio on when home alone
- Set realistic goals
These two came to me this morning while I was drying my hair which is also when I decided to write it all down. I’ve often thought about writing a note each year that I enter a new decade filled with advice from me in the present to my children, nieces, nephews (whatever life brings me) to read in the future when they turn that age. The idea of giving help to your past self, making sense of everything in that moment while you’re in it rather than trying to remember years down the line. Attempting to recollect how you felt, what you worried about, what bothered you and what mattered. Writing it down now will provide much roarer guidance to those who need it whenever they do, rather than relying on a failing memory in years to come.
3. listen to the radio more in general, it’s relaxing and informative
4. take each week as it comes
The list currently seems very random with no logical order but each point is valid and something I think about often. Throughout my life my Mum has always had a radio quietly playing in the background. She says it’s to keep the animals entertained while we’re all out at school and work which is true. I’m sure they love it. However, there is also something very comforting about having a bit of background noise and something very eery about not.
I find that noise links to productivity too despite being the worst at working with any sound whatsoever. I get so easily distracted that I’ve never understood people who can sit at a library desk with music blaring through their headphones because I’d end up singing along and typing the words I heard. Still, if the radio is on at the right volume level so I don’t really listen but can still hear, it helps me to concentrate more than in silence (something I failed to discover while at university).
While we’re on the topic, I’ve also decided to listen to the radio more. Sometimes there’s nothing more relaxing than shutting off for an hour and listening to a play. Not having to read anything, you can even close your eyes, just focus and chill. The interesting discussions about current news stories or fascinating research that are had reel me in and I just think why not sit in peace and listen. I learn a lot from it too which is a bonus and can still do things at the same time if needed – win win! Finding ways to relax and put your mind at peace so that you can focus on the story and not think about your worries is key and a blessing.
5. focus on others and their happiness, you’ll see benefits and feel good
6. listen more, you’ll ask less questions
As I go about my days trying to find my feet in the world I find that certain bits of guidance I’ve been given from others and learnt through experiences is repeated. These are the things that I note. Setting realistic goals is definitely up there and slides nicely together with taking each week as it comes. This applies to everything in life, it’s a coping mechanism and highlights the importance of not overwhelming yourself. As soon as you pile too much on you’ll become fatigued and not perform at your best. It’s much more productive to break it down into bite size pieces so that you can achieve and to your best potential.
I find another thing I tell myself often is about putting others first. Most people will have said to themselves probably more than once that they do this too much and never think about them. However, I think there’s so much good in putting others first and it brings joy to you. As much as you think that you’re constantly doing this and never thinking of yourself, we humans tend to talk about ourselves a lot, talk over others and forget to listen. Which brings me to my next topic. Listening. This is so important and a skill that has to be learnt. Nobody is expert at it and practise helps but once you listen more you’ll find your life less stressful because you’ll learn a lot more from others and find yourself asking less questions.
7. smile at strangers
8. Always allow room for new lessons
So as I continue through my twenties at the very start of a long and exciting life ahead, I’m beginning to be consciously aware of the advice given to me by friends and family and learnt through experiences that I have. Whether I end up sticking to my plan of writing a letter each decade or save it for one hefty ‘note to self’ at fifty full of epic advice which can be passed on to younger people will only be told by time, but I know for sure that I’m learning every single day.
Currently, as you’ll be able to figure after reading this post, my list is very messy at the moment, it’s getting lengthier by the second too, but over time I’ll be able to organise my mental folder and make a snappy list to live by made up of advice from all over the place. From many different people and during many different times in my little life.