Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

In case anyone is interested…

In case anyone is interested, I am a little nervous

About the easing of restrictions and the opening of the world again.

In case anyone is interested, I can’t get fully excited

About social events, big events, because there is always the risk looming.

In case anyone is interested, I may still wear a mask

To protect others, to protect me, to feel safer and secure in environments.

Environments we’ve not experienced ‘normally’ in well over a year

In case anyone is interest, I am going to take it steady

With life, in work in all that I do.

In case anyone is interested, I am going to allow

Allow for tiredness, feeling intimidated, overwhelmed, all of those feelings that come with this.

This thing we are living through that nobody quite understands

In case anyone is interested, I get it

I get why the government feel there is no other option, why now is time.

At some point we have to move on, to continue, to live with it

In case anyone is interested, I find writing therapeutic

So much creativity will come out of these times, some bad some good.

In case anyone is interested, I will always remember

These times, those lost, key workers, inspirations along the way.

If you’re not interested, that’s fine. Move on.

If you are please stay, I have lots to say!

(blogging weekly, Instagramming even more)

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is OUT NOW. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey as I self-publish novel number two, then please subscribe to my newsletter by filling in the form at the bottom of any page of my website. Thank you x

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Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

I never would have imagined

I never would have imagined a year with no contact. No hugs, no emotion, barely any guests at funerals and weddings.

I never would have imagined a year with no holidays. No travel within your own country let alone outside.

I never would have imagined a year with lots of closures. Barely going to the pub at all, no drunken memories or nights that carry on and on.

I never would have imagined a year being surrounded by it. On the news, Saturday night tv shows, in general conversation – everywhere.

We can look at it and think what is missing, what have we lost, see all that is wrong.

Or we can notice what we have gained, build up hope to continue on…

An appreciation for living in the very moment, zero planning.

Amazement at human adaptation, how everyone, almost everyone has found new ways, new avenues.

Strength in carrying on. Hope in the future.

True gratitude for the front line fighters, the NHS staff and essential workers.

‘2020 wasn’t all so bad,’ I’ve seen in many a status today,

Entering 2021 steadily and carefully because the virus hasn’t gone away.

Yet in 2020 we learnt about finding the rainbows in the storm,

We can enter the new year with this mindset, approach everything in this form.

Happy New Year’s Day, I really think, sometime soon, it will all be ok.

All blog posts can be found at https://www.harrietmills.co.uk/ and to read my published work visit my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is out now.

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Writing

In all of this breathe in the good and breathe out the bad…

I was walking home this morning from some friends who let me stay.
My sister has just arrived home from Mayuma and so near to her I do not wish to be!
She must quarantine for two weeks and before then she needed my bed.
So I had to ask my dear friends if I could stay at theirs, somewhere to rest my head.

The shop has been so frantic the past few days so after six we simply crashed.
A few beers in us and a quick but yummy tea what was on the tele mostly trash.
So we slept and recuperated for the community needs us to be around. Morning came, a delicious breakfast and then I walked out into the Sunday morning sound.

Fresh air and peace and spring time sunshine and smells.
The beautiful colours, the wonderful noises, the happiness it all brings. Walking along, breathing in and out I thought to myself in all this mess.
Life goes on, the flowers grow, the birds tweet and lay their nests.

So soak it in as much as you can, I thought, for this too will pass.
Life will go back to functioning, one day, and with our changed perspectives perhaps, peace will last.

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Writing

I think I had a bad dream…

I think I had a really bad dream the other night, I woke into a world where everything had gone wrong,
There was this virus that was spreading faster than anyone could handle and people were suffering, the figures rising on and on.

Other countries ahead of us were breaking news so scary to hear,
It was like watching our lives before it happened and knowing exactly what to fear.

It was like a film, still is, it doesn’t seem real,
Happy, full of gratitude and luck, I don’t know how else to feel.

Self isolation, quarantine and social distancing were the measures,
Pub closures, restaurants, any place where people gathered.

Life as we knew it was put on hold,
Stick to the advice we were told.

So, tell me, what will go down in history, how did we react?

Flocking to supermarkets and buying everything off the shelf,
First it was toilet rolls, then pasta, paracetamol, eggs and bread all those in good health.

While others at home struggled to get the goods,
Those who really needed them, they were stuck in the hood.

So Boris tried again, he came on tele to simply say:
Stay at home, please everyone. Unless it’s essential take another day.

Thankfully the situation appears to be improving,
Though the queues in the supermarkets, I’ve heard, are not moving.

The shelves are filling slowly and essentials many are able to get,
The round of applause on Thursday evening is something most will never forget.

Community is coming together and kindness is appearing near and far,
Just think, please, before you get in your car.

It’s for the wellbeing of the world, we must abide,
Stay at home, support the NHS, and help to save lives.

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations Writing

Since when did our world get so busy?

Since when did our world get so busy? Since when did we struggle to find time? Time has always been the same length. So tell me, what happened to mine?

Since when did we start having to set reminders; to text back, to wake up, to go out to dinner, to put things away. How did life get too manic that when we finally manage to stop we don’t know what to say.

Since when did we wish for things to slow down so much that we get home and lock the doors just to escape for a while.

If someone asks us to help out in the evening, we struggle to find the energy to go that extra mile.

Since when did work engulf us and every other aspect just have to fit in? To the point where we have to book a holiday and force ourselves, force ourselves to give in.

Since technology, since globalization, since everything got faster and easier and more complicated.

All these wonderful developments in this wonderful world that are all going to end up simply hated.

It has forced us to speed up, it has forced us to cram everything into the shortest spaces of time. It has forced us to find ways out to a simpler life and a bit of peace of mind.

Sometimes, just sometimes, take a slo-mo moment from your day. Perhaps don’t even stop just slow down and notice all the good around you in so many ways.

Notice friends, notice nature, notice family, notice pets, notice sounds, notice how it feels to be alive.

It is almost too much, so often too much, but what most of us want is easy and for easy we must strive.

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Writing

Pause For Thought

While doing the dishes, a pause for thought,
Waiting for the kettle to boil, pause for thought.

While walking your four legged friends, a pause for thought,
Waiting for a train, pause for thought.

While brushing your teeth, a pause for thought,
When you’re in the shower, pause for thought.

While sat in a waiting room, a pause for thought,
When you’re eating your lunch, pause for thought.

During the adverts on TV, a pause for thought,
Waking up five minutes before the alarm, pause for thought.

While travelling or stuck in traffic, a pause for thought,
The moment before you fall asleep at night, pause for thought.

In this busy little life we lead we have to find perks indeed,
Noticing areas on the daily can help keep our sanity.

Whether it’s at home or work and even if only short,
There are always moments in this busy little life when we can pause,
Pause For Thought.

Categories
Non-fiction Writing

My Head Is Filled With Stuff

My head is filled with stuff

From ideas to plans to what I’m going to have for lunch, it’s always full of stuff

My head is full of things

A house, my car, the lists that I need to complete, it’s just so full of things

My head is full of people

Friends, strangers, family – it’s packed full to the brim of lovely people

My head is full of ideas

Ideas for books, ideas for stories, interior design ideas and everything in between

My head is full of love

The love I have for others, the love they have for me and sometimes, occasionally I can share it

My head is full of positivity

It thinks well about how lucky I am, to have good people around, to have a good job that I enjoy, a home, belongings, many more days, it’s thoughts about how lucky I am

My head can be full of messiness

It stresses, it cries, it screams, it angers, it does all of those things but it also overcomes

My head can be tired

It fails to think, can’t converse, is exhausted of ideas, wishes to sleep, it sometimes does get tired

My head is sometimes, occasionally, very very rarely full of nothing

It rests, it chills, it soaks up the calm but it is not very often full of nothing

My head is filled with stuff.

Categories
Adulthood Observations Writing

The different versions of you

You are an individual, of course you are, just like nobody else. You could be happy one day and another day sad but you’ll still do it differently to everyone. As important as it is to be you and the best version of it that you can be, I still think we all have numerous very different versions of what this is.

There’s the work one. The I must be polite to everyone one. The musn’t swear no matter how better it will make me feel one. The must work hard even though I am so tired one.

There’s the play one. The swear as much as you like one. The drink as much as you can one. The no regrets until morning one.

There’s the meeting old friends one. The can’t stop talking and who needs to take breath anyway one. The so much to catch up on so the conversation is meaningful one.

There’s the friend you see every day one. The still can’t allow for breath but talking about nothing one. The let’s have another glass and talk more rubbish one.

There’s the happiness around dogs one. The forgiving for everything one. The being delighted no matter how bad they are being one – because who can be sad around dogs?

There’s the holiday one. The off duty one. The nothing matters how long it takes one. The I don’t care about organisation I have all the time in the world one. The no cares at all one.

There’s the mundane day one. The I have an hour to do everything so I’m going to stress about it all one. The getting home and listing all the things that I’ve stressed about and laughing it off in the car one.

There’s the crisis one. The everything is such a HUGE deal one. The how can I possibly cope one. The screaming at the top of my lungs while driving down country roads one.

There’s the reasoning one. The logical one. The irritatingly calm one. Jumping in when chaos has struck one.

For me, personally, there’s the questioning one. The querying all that I’m doing and all I’ve ever done one. Wondering if I’ll ever get married, find success, where I’ll end up one. The somewhat dramatic one.

Then there’s the writer in me. The fighter in me. The never giving upper in me. The I am happy, the stop worrying about the future, the keep going, pour another gin.

They may appear to be very different people, but I feel that these are all versions of one you.

Categories
Writing

Inside a mind

What time is it? Only 5:30 AM. Why am I up so early? I must go back to sleep but if I think too hard about it then I never will. What have I got to do today anyway? How long until I have to get ready for work?

It’s what goes on inside my mind

Ooh I’ve got an itch on my neck, I hope it doesn’t turn into a rash. Maybe I’m allergic to my necklace. I must make a cup of tea, that’ll get me going. Yes, that’s right. I’m going to be going strong today, stronger and better than ever before

It’s what occurs in my little brain

I’m glad I chose to walk to work today…oh gosh I didn’t finish my cup of tea, what a waste, oh well…it gives me time to enjoy music, enjoy the fresh air and hopefully lose a bit of weight for weigh day tomorrow…eeek

It’s what goes on inside my mind

I just smiled at that man a bit too enthusiastically as we passed each other in the street but then it may brighten his day and keep him smiling too. I musn’t be embarrassed for passing happiness on, oops I forgot to smile at someone I know. I hope they don’t think I’m rude

It happens to us all

He’s in a good mood today, they’re not at all, I guess some people like mornings and some don’t… ooh what’s this tune on the radio I like it, but what has happened to the radio it’s all jittery I can’t be having that

No matter how our mind goes on

Right I’ve got to do this, this and this, but which shall I do first? I’ll serve this lady and then consider what order to get things done….OH NO! THE BACON!

We always leave room to forget

I wonder how my Grandad is getting on since moving back home, I must sort out paying a visit to him soon.

But we never forget the important things

I’ll just sort through this pile to clear my head before starting to write. Boots vouchers, receipts, rubbish – MY CAR TAX! Whoops

Unless it has anything to do with finance

That bottle of Prosecco is really very cool, gold! The candle suits it. Is it too early for a drink? Yes stop being silly, you’ve got work to do

And no matter how much the mind takes us away

Focus, focus, focus, there’s plenty of time to procrastinate but now isn’t it. Drink can come tomorrow after your lovely relaxing yoga class. Peppermint tea is yum and I need to dust my desk

We always return to reality