Tag: covid19

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

In case anyone is interested…

In case anyone is interested, I am a little nervous

About the easing of restrictions and the opening of the world again.

In case anyone is interested, I can’t get fully excited

About social events, big events, because there is always the risk looming.

In case anyone is interested, I may still wear a mask

To protect others, to protect me, to feel safer and secure in environments.

Environments we’ve not experienced ‘normally’ in well over a year

In case anyone is interest, I am going to take it steady

With life, in work in all that I do.

In case anyone is interested, I am going to allow

Allow for tiredness, feeling intimidated, overwhelmed, all of those feelings that come with this.

This thing we are living through that nobody quite understands

In case anyone is interested, I get it

I get why the government feel there is no other option, why now is time.

At some point we have to move on, to continue, to live with it

In case anyone is interested, I find writing therapeutic

So much creativity will come out of these times, some bad some good.

In case anyone is interested, I will always remember

These times, those lost, key workers, inspirations along the way.

If you’re not interested, that’s fine. Move on.

If you are please stay, I have lots to say!

(blogging weekly, Instagramming even more)

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is OUT NOW. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey as I self-publish novel number two, then please subscribe to my newsletter by filling in the form at the bottom of any page of my website. Thank you x

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

My Lockdown Google.

I think at some point this year we’ve all been in one or more of these places… GOOGLE THE CONFUSION! Here goes…

Nearest OPEN takeaway near me…

How to wear a Facemask…

Which face coverings are acceptable?

Is it acceptable to guide others on how to wear a face mask?

What are the COVID rules?

Am I allowed to leave my house?

McDonald’s breakfast times…

Weather forecast for Sunday…

Gift ideas for cancelled weddings 🙁

What is the recommended daily alcohol intake?

How many calories in a Corona beer?

What are the current COVID rules?

Am I allowed to leave my house?

Are we going into another lockdown?

Is it all too late?

Is Boris ok?

Does Trump really have Coronavirus?

Is this all a nightmare?

Am I allowed to leave my house?

How to drink tea with a visor on…

How to drink tea in a mask…

Notonthehighstreet

Amazon…BUY NOW

What did I order last night?

Am I allowed to leave my house?

(for retailers) what’s a healthy level of frustration towards someone you don’t know?

Is wine one of your five a day?

Will this ever end?

Local small business gift ideas…

Is wine an essential retailer?

Am I allowed to leave my house?

When will I get the vaccine?

Is there ever going to be any good news?

How long will this go on for?

Why did he eat a bat?

Book recommendations for lockdown?

Netflix best shows…

Is crochet difficult?

How many jigsaws in one year is the record?

Am I allowed to leave my house?

2020, we’ve all googled it!

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

Honesty is the best policy, I hope you agree

Recently I’ve been feeling pretty flat yet frantic. Not drastically so just I’ve felt lower more often than I’ve felt like smiling. Anger has got the better of me and I feel so cross. All of the time.

My head is so busy yet sometimes so empty. My fretting of the future has been amplified. How am I meant to find ‘the one’ when I can’t freely go to the pub!?

I digress.

Two people very close to me were affected by COVID-19 this week, negative tests, but affected nonetheless and it hit home. The reality sunk in.

I then look to the dogs in bed beside me not knowing what’s going on in our world and happily content in theirs. Bliss.

I find it so easy to focus only on tv dramas because the issues displayed are not my own. I can easily zone into books because they too are different worlds away from the dismay of what we are living through. People are hugging, close, enjoying pub life and restaurants without guilt. Enjoying life. Normality.

But then here on our earth there are doctors and nurses in despair. Government in chaos. Decision makers ripping their hair out. Well, any that they have left.

I try to avoid the news. It’s awful. Even for five minutes.

I turn the news on to see people literally crying for their livelihood. Never knowing when it’s going to end. People feeling awful for normal social lovely things like going for a pint or for a pizza. I want to spend a Sunday afternoon enjoying a pub cooked roast and drinking plenty of wine without a tag on to track me! It’s so odd. Everything is practically illegal.

The reality that parents are struggling to put shoes on their children’s feet and food in their mouths is everywhere. It’s a crisis. It’s scary.

I know I shouldn’t feel this way because I have so much when others have so little. I should be grateful and only that. Then I am human, this is where I’m at some of the time. I soon snap out of it but occasionally I think it’s ok to let everything get on top of you, just for one second. Especially during the times we are living through.

I’ve just skipped the frustration out of my bones ready for another day, putting a jolly face on for the public who most probably also feel similar. My favourite time of the day is 6pm, sipping on a beverage in the company of great people, thinking how truly lucky I am.

There’s not too much purpose to this post except therapy for me and hopefully reassurance for others. Hopefully I’ll read over it in 6 months to a year and be happy that things have improved. Massively hopeful.

Until next time.

H x 🙂

All blog posts can be found at https://www.harrietmills.co.uk/ and to read my published work visit my portfolio.

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

2020, I took a DAY OFF

It’s Monday. Monday 7th September 2020 and I am enjoying the first day off I’ve had all year. I am bloody loving it. I’m sat here at 2:10pm with a chilled glass of white wine, sat on a recliner and feeling happy from the inside out.

It wasn’t until I heard a specialist discussing on BBC Breakfast the importance of a day off. It could only be a single day but it does the world of good. She was saying how so many front line workers; nurses, doctors etc – haven’t taken their holiday entitlement due to having no choice or having nowhere to go. It’s dangerous. Physically and mentally it is dangerous and I don’t think I realised this until now.

I knew how beneficial this day was going to be as I left on Saturday afternoon for the Suffolk coast. When I was discussing with my boss when I would return, I felt an urge push me from within against coming back to work Monday lunchtime. A full day is what I needed. A full day when I should have been working.

Of course, each week I have Sunday’s. They are the BEST. I read, listen to podcast, visit friends, drink plenty, write, do chores that I’ve missed during the week. It’s too much. I need longer to fit it all in. There is also a completely different mindset to having a day off when the rest of the world is working. I feel that brilliant feeling that I always feel when I’m at the beach, my happiest place, but I feel it amplified because I should be at work.

I should be at work, but I’m not.

I should be at work, but I’m drinking wine at 2pm.

I should be at work, but instead I’m buying toys for my dog which he loves.

I should be at work, but I’m having a McDonald’s breakfast (and only just made it in time).

I should be at work, but it started raining so I went back to bed.

I should be at work, but I finished my book.

I should be at work, but I didn’t put a bra on (and went out in public MULTIPLE times). No cares.

…It is now Friday and I am still feeling the benefits of having that extra day to myself. More time to do nothing. Seriously, if you’ve worked tirelessly this year and haven’t taken any time out, consider it. A day is sometimes all you need to recuperate and get right back to it again.

It’s 2020 and I took a day off.

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is available on Amazon along with the sequel Don’t Tell Jack. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey, then please subscribe to my newsletter by dropping your name and email. There will be plenty of giveaways, news hot off the press and an honest insight into life as an author. Thank you x

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations Writing

2020 – an update

I’m chuckling to myself at how particular I am. I must tell you this before I begin. With everything from timings to activities and how I undertake them, I have to have everything just so. Maybe something is wrong with me? I don’t really care.

Granted I have work at 10 so my free time is restricted and therefore setting my alarm for a series of time slots in which I can get different things done is a necessity. However, it does make me laugh. NEVER HAVE ENOUGH TIME!

NB: This was Monday morning, not today.

7am – I woke up. Allowed half an hour to enjoy a hot cup of coffee (a rarity) before reading under the light of my bedside lamp for just over half an hour. Subconsciously, I got up, turned my bedside lamp off and big light on, window open to hear the birds and the breeze, another coffee and a flapjack for fuel and then it was writing time!

My writing…

My writing has been going ok lately despite everything that is happening. I am behind with the constant that is my second novel and also the plans for a third, lock down novel, but I am managing to keep up with prioritising.

My second proof came first and that has been sent off. Hoorah! My blog must continue, so here I am. This week’s to-do list includes more work on my two novels as well as reading up to date my writing magazines which have been somewhat neglected. Oops. It is crazy how much I used to fit onto my to-do list (and complete) each week pre-covid19.

Social…

My social life even nudged me to stay awake and out past 10:30pm on a Saturday night this weekend! I visited friends in a town about half an hour from where I live and it’s the furthest I’ve been since 23rd March. It felt good to drive and blast out the tunes and it was only the forth time I’ve left my village in this debarcle.

I even incorporated a drive-through dinner into this trip which was both bloody brilliant and bloody awful. I arrived glancing at the queue for McDonald’s and KFC to find them both very similar in hugeness. My friend asked for Popcorn chicken so I committed to KFC. Seconds later, the McDonald’s queue moved rapidly on to the point that hardly anyone was in it so I immediately regretted my decision but I’d committed so I had to wait it out.

The rain hammered onto my windscreen as we all edged along slowly nearing the entrance. I read the sign saying that there was a reduced menu and steam starting coming out of my ears when I imagined the result if Popcorn chicken wasn’t on this reduced menu. It was. Thankfully. All was ok. Half an hour later I left for the road.

I also experienced Tesco for the first time since lock down, in fact my first supermarket experience, or one of queuing outside a store that you’d, pre-covid19, have walked happily in to. It wasn’t so bad. Apparently restrictions have eased so I can’t imagine how it once was.

Work…

Work continues to drain us of energy and come 5pm only beer will get us through, but it’s all fun and games right? We’ll look back one day and be proud.

But it’s all good…

The birds continue to sing, nature still impresses and good things are everywhere admist the worry of the future.

You just gotta keep on keeping on…as they say…

H

X

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is available on Amazon along with the sequel Don’t Tell Jack. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey, then please subscribe to my newsletter by dropping your name and email. There will be plenty of giveaways, news hot off the press and an honest insight into life as an author. Thank you x

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

Isolation: best of a bad situation 1-3

As with all of my Covid-19 related posts, I am trying to keep things as upbeat as possible. While I feel I haven’t properly experienced lock down due to being a key worker and work being busier than ever, I fully understand how people can find it difficult.

Of course I miss things. I miss being able to pop out without purpose. To mill around the shops without anything urgent to buy and while away minutes, sometimes longer, just mooching. Allowing my mind to completely switch off from work and, and, well life.

I miss popping to the pub for a quick livener and then stumbling out however many hours later having chatted utter rubbish all afternoon and into the evening. Not remembering a thing with those I’ll never forget.

I miss going out for dinner and lunch. The other day my friend showed me a receipt from a place we have been quite recently, just before the lock down was enforced in fact, and we stopped for a minute just missing normal life. I hate to think of how these small businesses must be suffering.

I miss family and friends who I’ve not seen and the social plans that have been cancelled due to this awfulness. I feel so bad for those who have had to cancel or postpone big plans that they have eagerly awaited for so long and worked hard to make just right.

I have found, particularly on Saturday afternoons after a week of it (so tiredness probably doesn’t help matters), that I have been way more emotional. I have worried about everything way more. I have found myself feeling sad and then taking a nap so that the feeling can’t worsen.

I could continue but, as I said at the start, I want to focus on the good.

I have also found peace in many things and it has felt good. Here are just a few… finding the best in a bad situation ideas 1 to 3.

Podcasts

Podcasts are very similar to books in that they allow that same escapism while feeling like I’m doing something useful. I learn a lot from Podcasts. Currently I am addicted to Dawn O’Porter’s new series Dawn O’pod. I don’t listen as soon as they are released as I haven’t the time in the week but on Sunday’s I make a point of catching up and it’s lovely. Yesterday, I found the Dear Dawn very relatable and it made me feel so much better after hearing that other women think the way that I do.

Noticing things

Pre lock down I evaluated more than I noticed. I still do, but before this lock down I did it a whole lot more. Hear me out. I analyse my every move. If I didn’t say “thank you” at the right time I will beat myself up about it for ages afterwards. I assess how polite I was always. Judge how I held myself. Ensure I did everything correctly to the social norms. When I leave someone’s home. After every conversation. Every encounter. When alone and just thinking about my life, possibly comparing to others, possibly not. It’s exhausting.

Recently I have found myself still doing it, but being able to (mostly) shut my brain off and instead notice. Noticing the birds, nature, my surroundings. Noticing my life and what a huge bunch of beautiful souls I have in it. Noticing smells of flowers and the warmth of the sun. More than usual. I guess it’s the same practice as meditating and being in the moment. It really helps.

Red Wine

My drinking throughout this craziness has, like so many others out there, got out of hand. But, hey. Red wine makes me happy. I know drinking anything alcoholic has this effect after the first few sips. That buzz that fills you and the sensation of total relaxation, especially after a long day (my reason for drinking every day).

Isolation, or what of it I’ve experienced, has made me notice that the same buzz happens with red wine but on a heightened scale making me exceedingly happy and relaxed. You probably already know this but if you’re not already a red wine drinker, trust me and give it a try.

These certainly don’t exhaust my list of best bits during lock down and things to help those struggling, but they are some of the things I have found help in a positive way during these desperate times. There will be more so watch this space.

I hope you can take ideas from this new blog series and that they help you too if needed xoxo

H

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

Things isolation has taught me:

  1. People can be kinder when stressed and worried
  2. People can be a lot nastier when stressed and worried
  3. I am lucky
  4. There is usually a solution
  5. Learning to just be is a very very healthy skill to learn
  6. There is always hope
  7. Beer/Wine IS essential
  8. It will take more than a pandemic to make my place of work “quiet”
  9. Dawn O’Porter is awesome!
  10. Doing nothing (to most Brits) involves a large alcoholic beverage
  11. Someone will always moan
  12. Tiredness is nothing compared to what so many others are going through
  13. Helping others creates a happy you
  14. This too will pass, always.
  15. Daffodils are beautiful, spring still happens, nature still happens no matter what
  16. Thankful for sunshine
  17. I write better in the sunshine
  18. Living on a diet of sugar and wine is ok
  19. There still isn’t much time in a day
  20. Some people find staying home a lot harder than others
  21. Struggling to stay awake past 8pm isn’t for the oldies. I’m 25, I’m struggling!
  22. Our customers bake really lush cakes!
  23. I’m very lucky to have a garden
  24. Exercise comes naturally when I have one allowance to leave the house on my days off
  25. I’m happy to work
  26. Sitting outside post-work is a blessing
  27. I have lots of blessings
  28. The busier I am, the more unhealthy my diet is
  29. Simple things are the best things
  30. I needn’t wish for more

For links to all of my writing related stuff, my link tree is below. You can also find published work in my portfolio. My debut novel, Dear Brannagh, is available on Amazon along with the sequel Don’t Tell Jack. If you enjoy what you’re seeing here and are interested in following me on my writing journey, then please subscribe to my newsletter by dropping your name and email. There will be plenty of giveaways, news hot off the press and an honest insight into life as an author. Thank you x

linktr.ee/HJMWriting

Categories
Adulthood Non-fiction Observations

Isolation: the reality

This is all a bit strange isn’t it? I think we’re all feeling a bit weird.

I didn’t think that the isolation situation had got to me yet. All week I have been busying about at work with just a few hours out in which I cleaned my desk, played with my dog in the garden and generally enjoyed not staring at a selection of groceries working out which order they belong to (I am happy to help).

Each evening I have gulped a few beers faster than usual before crashing into a heap in the land of nod. Shattered.

Saturday afternoon was the first time I had a good amount of time to myself to experience what the majority of the nation had experienced all week. I loved it. I slept a lot, sat down a lot and enjoyed a run where more people were out wandering than usual.

I watched a film in the evening and consumed two civilized beers before taking myself to bed in my newly cleansed room. It felt good. After applying a good amount of hand cream to my ever crisping hands, I fell asleep, stinging a bit.

I woke on Sunday morning feeling fresh. It was 6:20am which was actually 5:20am and my dog was barking. No change there. Waiting it out a little to see if we would both go back to sleep, I gave in and went downstairs to boil the kettle and let my dog out for a pee (I couldn’t cope with him wetting the bed that early in the morning).

A cuppa in one hand and my dog in the other, I felt very content and headed back into my dozing slumber. The next few hours were spent in and out of consciousness. Reading, cuddling, drinking warm beverages and eating a pastry.

It got to half eleven and I text some friends in the village to see if they needed anything as I was off to Waitrose. It was like a normal Sunday. This is not a normal Sunday.

I wasn’t really thinking but assuming that my trip was essential being the first time I had left the village all week. They replied urging me, quite rightly, to stay home. So I did.

Beer – not essential. Snacks – I have plenty. Other essential items – not essential. I can do without shampoo for one day.

It made me realise that I was probably justifying my one trip, but what I really was after was sanity for my mind. I soon realised there are plenty of ways to get this inside the home. During isolation. Alone.

Don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy my company, time to myself and a Sunday filled with doing absolutely nothing but when my mind is a bit crazy, which it has been for a few weeks, I struggle.

I’m not going to pretend that I am completely ok with this scenario we find ourselves in. I’m not afraid to admit that my mind is more chaotic than ever. OF COURSE IT IS, I AM A WRITER. That a trip to the beach, more than one walk, a drive out and a mooch around the shops would help. I’m just saying all of this can wait and they will come and we will look forward to them.

It isn’t essential that we go out. It is essential that we try and stay home.

I’m about to listen to Dawn O’Porter’s So Lucky podcasts while sorting another area of my room. While my mind feels wild at the moment, I know it’ll feel calmer after. Just like it would after a drive. Just like it would after a trip to the beach. Just like it would after a mooch around the shops or a sip of a beer (of which I have NONE!).

While this may be a lot more painful for so many of you, I’m just trying to say as I’m just realising myself that we all need to adapt. Those moments will come but for now there are many ways we can find peace within our minds.

Listen to the radio (perhaps not the news). Meditate. Put on your favourite playlist and dance around the house. Stare out into the sun. Appreciate the view. Tidy. Sort. Read.

I think it will do our mental health some good. I hope it will anyway.

I hope you have a peaceful Sunday x